YOYO's blue space

I have been super super high since I booked my tickets home in July.

To avoid myself being mocked over, I have even stuck to my ' no-food-after-seven' diet plan

.... for an amazingly 12 days so far.

Generally in a cheerful and silly mood, killing my time mostly on animes and films.

 

Having started to dream all the crazy things I 'd like to do in my Holiday, lol

A trip to Thailand-Malay-Singapore-HongKong is on my agenda, providing that

 the political protest will be settling down by July.

Dad is already nagging , is it safe to go to Thailand ?

 with the protest, + swine flu is possibly on its way to invade Asia.

Who knows? I keep my fingers crossed until the last moment,praying for a good time.

Worst case scenario will be..... stuck with mum and daddy for 8 weeks

and stuff myself with loads mouth-watering snacks.

Doesn't sound horrible but not exciting neither.

 

Still not sure about whether I should go back to full-time study

or continue what I am doing from this Sep.

Learning Japanese will stay in the picture whatsoever

The saddest thing is feeling old and watching your dream die one after another.......

No more... please no more.....

Why Japanese? I wonder...

The gentle sheen of the culture? The extremeness and eccentricity hidden behind it ?

Never fingered out.

 

Maybe, life is a boat and I should just let it float ....... to where my heart desires.

Nice day, Mina-san

 

 

病了，感冒+发烧。

现在刚刚好了些，但是还咳嗽得厉害，像要把肺都吐出来一样。

病了，感觉什么都无所谓了

什么斗志都没有了。

迷迷糊糊的就特别想回家

想吃妈妈煮的绿豆粥

No matter how high once we aimed for

Sickness brings it all down

I have missed two lessones last week. Something that normally would give me a panic attack, but right now

I found myself geniunely don't give a F**K  about anything.

Who cares about the June's exam.

Who cares about to be fully qualified before this Dec.

All I do care about right now is how to stop coughing , how to get a decent sleep at night.

Having grounded myself for nearly 4 days indoor, I decided to get my life back to normally from tomorrow.

Morning class, meeting friends in afternoon + $%^&*()

If there is a god, please stop the coughing right now!!!!!

............................

See there is a reason why I am an atheist after all. lol.......

 

2009的第一天，早，5点零5分

又一次的尝试睡眠失败，又一次的爬起

脑子里一团乱麻

mariko的道别晚餐，soho好吃的蛋糕和泰晤士河边花花绿绿的彩灯

伦敦的大年夜显得分外慌乱

唯一悠闲的是喝的东倒西歪的人群，地铁里，马路边，放肆的喧哗

警察的心情也特别好，全副武装的只在寒冷中疏导交通

 

一直到睡觉前一刻心情都极其亢奋

脑袋接触枕头的一霎那，眼皮一旦合起来，不由自主地来到了另一个世界

 

这个完美而矛盾的世界里

自己很孤独也很富有

住在一栋大大的房子里，有一只可爱的猫

客厅里有地毯，火炉。

我，平躺在地毯上看着天花板上的吊灯

身边，有颗蓝色的圣诞树，没有礼物

就这样躺着享受着宁静和炉火的温暖。

 

轻轻问自己，是不是病了？是不是不够开心？生活中缺少什么？还是已经有了却不情愿放弃寻找？

是不是在自寻烦恼？

我的2009在失眠中拉开帷幕。

无论明天是什么，想要自己学会放手，学会满足。

祝所有的朋友新年快乐安康。

 

 

Tnnd.

I was dropped at 2 bus stops away from home yesterday.

why? Apparently one 30K+ Metro bus driver was distracted by some inexplicable reasons and forgot to stop the bus !

When I went up to him, knocked his bullet proof glass, asked politely ' excuse me , but why didn't you stop? ' ,

his reaction was ' oh, oh.... I thought you meant to get off the next stop' .

' Why would I press the button two stops early if I had meant that? ' I said it to myself, in my mind of course.

On surface, I was more than silent.

Mute, staring into his eyes just long enough to make him uncomfortable, then I got off the bus started walking.

 

What is it with our Metro bus drivers?

Nobody says it's an easy piece to swallow, this job.

Tourists, crowds, verbal abuses and even physically ones sometime.

But majority of passengers are like me , aren't they?

Conventional, quiet, non-voilent and just normal people who have the need to get around for various purposes.

Being paid averagely 30K+ annually doesn't compensate a simply job like this?

Oh please! If London is a jungle , full of dangerous, then any city in south east Asia can undoubtedly be called  war zone.

Throw any Metro driver into Bangkok, Hongkong, Beijing or Shanghai.

They wouldn't survive a day without bleed bleed and bleed.

There have already been plenty of complaints regards our over-paid but poorly-performing Metro drivers.

Anybody who thinks those complaints are unfounded should take a hard look at reality.

Disgruntled passengers don't just fall from air,  they are ordinary folks who have had enough of the incompetence

of few. I am sure 90% of our Metro buses are driven by responsible , caring and give-a-shit people.

So that's 10%  irresponsible and  big-headed drivers keep generating  10% unhappy customers -- around 1 million of us? everyday?

Whoever takes it far enough to make a complain must have suffered more than enough.

I am not there yet, even tough I have been dropped twice away from home, still smiling.....

 

I wonder what is it like to have robotic buses in London.

Human without human touch are wrose creatures than machine!!!

 

Have missed 3 Japanese lessons this month, I have drown myself in my mid-term assessment preparation.

The speaking part didn't go as well as planned, but I am trying to catch up with other 4 modules by doing

at least a piece of writing every single day.

The wrost part is  timing.

Nothing I hate more than timing myself.

1 and half hours? two essaies?

I wonder when do I get my chance for real teaching practice.

Shame on me really, I used to think teaching is a damn easy job.

Until, one day, I felt my legs shaking in front of a class.

God, I genuinely lack of confidence in this.

Maybe some speech coaching would help.

However, my days are going to be busy and seriously fruitful after the exam, 10th of Dec.

On the same day of exam, our whole class of enthuasitists are planning a celebration dinner and may be clubbing.

Not sure about the clubbing part as I am easily irritated by too many people and noise, but the dinner is a 100% must go for me . HaHa

Then, another dinner party with Mariko and yoko on the 11th of the Dec.

Then, another small meet up with local Chinese community on the 12th

 

Mariko and Yoko will  have passed their final assessment and officially become Japanese teachers by then.

Wow.... I am so welled up right now, thinking of the first time I met them in Costa coffee, the moon festival party in their college.....

Time really flies...... sigh.........

These girls are leaving London in a month. And yet I have no ideal when I can see them again.

Good accompanies and nice people, these girls are forever hopeful about life, forever looking forward to their goals.

Just wish I can complete my teaching practice next year and be fully qualified.

My new era will start soon . I can almost feel its pace, getting closer and closer.

My dream may sounds silly and surreal.

It's not about a big happy family or a faithful lover on side.

Please let me be alone but happy, as free as a bird who only wants to see the world.

Please let me sing and be lean, always a little girl in an adult's suit.

Please do not numb my heart with everyday chores and put me down with egos and hardships.

Let me just be me, a hopeful, a day-dreamer who still believes everything is possible in this chaotic world.

mm.... bless

Time for revision....... ciao